8 Grammar Mistakes Your Probably Making Every Day (I Did That on Purpose)

I’m no grammar purist. Trying to nail English down to a particular set of rules will leave you heartbroken and muttering, “it’s supposed to say 12 items or fewer” to a disinterested supermarket checker. Language changes constantly and it belongs to all of us to use or misuse however we like. “Irregardless” now means the same thing as “regardless,” “amirite” is a dictionary-approved word, and no one has to consult Strunk or White about anything.

On the other hand, people judge you by the way you communicate, especially in a professional setting, so you should at least be aware of how you’re coming off. Thus, I’ve collected eight common examples of non-standard English and explained a little about what is considered their correct usage. Feel free to ignore all of it.

When the subject of a sentence is a group, it can be tricky to choose the right pronoun to refer to it. Whether to go with “it” or “they” depends on the focus of the sentence. If you’re talking about the group itself, go with “it.” If you’re talking about the members within the group, go with “they.” So you’d say, “Meta laid off many of its employees,” but, “the mob of jobless employees set fire to their VR headsets.” (Even though “mob” seems to be the subject of the sentence, it’s actually “employees,” with “a mob of” acting as a modifier.) You can also think of it this way: we generally don’t refer to people as “it,” only “he,” “she,” or “they.”

If a group has a proper name—a sports team, a rock band, a corporation—“it” is often the right choice because you’re usually referring to the group itself, not the people within it. But there are many exceptions. A sentence like, “the Pirates is winning in the eighth inning,” is technically correct (at least according to the Chicago Manual of Style), but it’s still dumb. First, because the Pirates are never winning in the eighth, but secondly, because everyone, everywhere, would say or write, “the Pirates are winning in the eighth.” The plural throws a wrench in the works, and even though it shouldn’t matter, it does. That’s how it goes sometimes.

In summation,“Jefferson Starship is the greatest rock band of all time, and it is on tour.” is fine; so is “The Ramones are the greatest rock band of all time, and they are on tour.” It’s anarchy in this part of English.

Special note: If any group or person tells you they prefer to be referred to with as a specific pronoun, do it, and don’t be an asshole.

After the uncertainty of the previous slide, I need some stability in my life, so here’s a no-exceptions rule: When used as a relative pronoun, “who” is used to refer to people. “That” refers to inanimate objects. Boom! Done!

Oh, crap. Sometimes it doesn’t work that way. You can use “that” to refer to people, but you generally shouldn’t. It wouldn’t be wrong to say/write, “He is the one that shot me,” but “he is the one who shot me,” is preferable. (Or go with “he shot me.”) Also, groups of people can be referred to using “that”—“The angry mob that stormed the capital,” for instance. I’m sorry for not having a definite answer.

When to use “lie” versus “lay” has to have a concrete rule, right? Nah. But here’s as close as I can get. “Lay” is used when referring to an object, as in, “lay the blanket on the bed.” Whereas “lie” does not require an object: “I am going to lie down for an hour and not think about grammar.” It sounds simple, but of course it isn’t, because “lay” is also the past tense of “lie,” where the past tense of “lay” is “laid.” Why are you like this, English language?

Anyway, here’s an example: “Yesterday I laid a blanket on my bed before I lay down to sleep. Now I’m going to lay another blanket on my bed before I lie down to sleep.”

It gets worse, though, because the past tense of “lie,” when you mean “to tell an untruth” is “lied.” Also: “laid” means “had sex” in slang terms. So let’s make a sentence with all of this: “Yesterday, I lied when I said I got laid. I really just laid a blanket on my bed before I lay down. Today I am going to lay a blanket on my bed, then lie down, then get laid. In that specific order.”

I almost forgot “now I lay me down to sleep.” That famous sentence seems wrong, but it is technically correct, if archaic, because “me” is the object being laid to sleep. It would be more clear to write “now I lie down to sleep,” though.

English is the worst. Consider “compliment” and “complement.” They are pronounced the same, but mean different things. “Compliment” is an expression of praise. “Complement” most commonly means something that completes, enhances, or perfects. So, “I complimented her on how her Motörhead tour shirt complemented her outfit.”

“Complimentary” means “expressing a compliment,” but it also means “free,” like those complimentary towels from Motel 6 that complement my bathroom.

“Complement” also has specialized meanings in the fields of mathematics, geometry, grammar, medicine, and economics. We could get very far into the weeds about the complement system in the blood, the meaning of “complementary goods” in economics, and why 90 degree angles are considered complementary (not complimentary) in geometry, but let’s not be nerds for a change—“complementary” means “to complete” in all those contexts, at least in the broadest sense.

Every grammatical authority on earth would disagree with me here, but I think you should just use “compliment” and “complement” interchangeably. It’s a free country, and no one will arrest you for it, so go ahead and write “he gave me a very nice complement!” or “iPhone cases are an example of a complimentary good.” Or whatever you want. Words are not the boss of you.

You can tell how old a person is by whether they say “on accident” or “by accident.” Older people are more likely to say “by accident.” People born after 1995 are more likely to say “on accident.” I am ancient, so I say “by accident.”

I realize that “on accident” makes more sense because its opposite is “on purpose,” but it still clanks in my ears. That’s my problem, though. Once crusty old jerks like me die off, everyone will be saying “but I did it on accident!” while being disciplined by their robot overlords. For now, though, you should consider the context. It’s common to say “on accident” but it’s a phrase that is almost never seen in published books. It’s cool in informal writing, but for most professional purposes, “by accident” or “accidentally” are better choices.

It’s fairly common to mix up “into” and “in to,” as they sound the same and are spelled the same but for that space. There’s an easy way to remember which one to use though, because you’e choosing between two words and one. “Into” is a preposition that indicates something is going within something else. “In to” doesn’t mean anything, because it’s two separate words that often end up next to each other, even though each is part of a different phrase. To check if you are correct, read your sentence aloud and pause between “in” and “to.” When you hear, “I went in...to get my keys,” it makes sense—two separate phrases—but if you read “I went in...to the house” it doesn’t sound right.

The ellipsis is an annoyingly overused punctuation mark. There are only two official, AP Style Guide-sanctioned uses for an ellipsis:

Omitting parts of a quotation isn’t a frequent occurrence for most writers, but people use ellipses all the damn time to indicate a pause…what was I saying? Oh yeah…ellipses. There is almost always a better choice in any kind of formal writing.

Informal writing is like the adult ghost tour: you can say whatever the hell you want. But you should know that frequent use of the ellipsis is annoying and…weak. it suggests you’re omitting words… in your own writing, or that you’re trailing off in the middle of… your own paragraph…or that you don’t know how punctuation works. If you must use ellipsis, do so sparingly. Save it for the big pause before the punchline to a joke, or to ironically suggest a cliffhanger. Like “is this the end for our hero…?”