I've studied highly emotionally intelligent people for 20 years—8 things they never ever do when talking to others
If you want to boost your emotional intelligence, it's important to communicate and read body language effectively. EQ researcher and TEDx speaker Harvey Deutschendorf shares what the most emotionally intelligence people never do when talking to others.
Tekef
1. They don't focus just on themselves.
Everyone appreciates being acknowledged for something they did well and have pride in.
Doing this with sincerity ensures that you will be remembered in a positive light — putting you in a category above all the people who haven't seemed to notice.
2. They don't force their opinions onto others.
3. They don't say, "It's not my responsibility."
Exceptional employees will not walk past a problem or something they could help with just because it's not in their job description.
They're always willing to share their time and knowledge. They view their role as a key part of larger whole and often look for ways to contribute to the organization.
4. They don't waste their time with just anybody.
Mentally tough and self-aware people hang out with other positive-thinking individuals with whom they share common goals and aspirations. They support one another and celebrate each other's achievements.
Negative people, on the other hand, will only drain your energy. When you're around them, do your best to tune out the noise and limit your interaction.
5. They don't let anything distract them when others are speaking.
Have you ever spoken with someone who was distracted, glancing at other people in a crowd, or checking their watch while you were speaking? You likely felt you were not important to that person.
Make others aware that you are focused by facing them squarely, smiling and making eye contact.
6. They don't forget the little details.
When you meet someone for the first time, repeat their name and sprinkle it throughout the conversation.
Remember things that are important, such as the names of their partner, children, pets or favorite vacation spots. By doing so and mentioning them at appropriate times the next time you see them, you'll stand out.
As your relationship deepens, consider taking note of important dates (e.g. their birthday or anniversary), and then send cards or call on those dates.
7. They stay away from offensive or tasteless jokes.
Simply put, if there is any possibility that someone may find a joke offensive, don't say it. It is one of the quickest ways to turn people off, because it indicates a huge deficit of awareness and sensitivity.
8. They don't do all the talking.
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