Wisdom Is Our Deepest Source of Strength

The beauty of our true nature is that we possess its qualities already. Explore these qualities and their connection to cultivating mindfulness, wisdom, well-being, and skilful action in our lives.

Over the years of working with many different people in workshops, retreats, and in one-on-one coaching, I have found that we all have wisdom within us. No matter what difficulties or mental struggles we were working with at the time, when I can guide them out of confusion and into a place of deep presence, by inhabiting the present moment, clients start to show these qualities:

When combined, these qualities are what I would call wisdom, or what I sometimes refer to as spiritual intelligence—a way of being in the world guided by the aspects of our deeper being.

The 7 Strengths of Wisdom

Love: The most prominent of all the seven strengths is that of love. I have found that when they became connected to their deep nature, clients often understood things differently and began spontaneously showing compassion, care and kindness to both themselves and others. This often extended to feelings of benevolence, warmth and friendliness towards all of life. This love for life was often the catalyst for a change in living that reflected this new perspective on, and relationship with, the world around them. This aspect of our deeper awareness has been beautifully expressed by mindfulness teacher and author Mark Coleman: “Do not tell me that kindness and awareness are different. Awareness is the foundation of kindness. Kindness is the expression of awareness.” 

“Do not tell me that kindness and awareness are different. Awareness is the foundation of kindness. Kindness is the expression of awareness.” 

Clarity: Once they inhabited the present moment deeply, people seemed to naturally connect to deeper insights and higher perspectives than were available to them before. Many had the sudden sense of confidence that they knew what to do in their lives and how to heal or manage certain internal and external struggles they had been grappling with. The problems and inner turmoil that had before seemed all consuming now suddenly felt manageable. No longer feeling stuck, overwhelmed or confused, their minds calmed and cleared.

Peace: With enough defusion from thoughts, clients started to feel much greater inner peace. This often came with a sense of ‘snapping out of it’, waking up and finding a quiet and still place inside where they knew everything was fundamentally OK. I often saw an immediate change in their facial expressions, signalling a deep relaxation, when they touched down in this place of inner calm.

Playful curiosity: There was often quite a notable switch as they moved from being stuck in cycles of self-judgment, rigidity, or resistance to a non-judgmental curiosity about different aspects of their experience, including difficult thoughts and feelings. Often they started displaying a more relaxed and open-hearted attitude towards themselves and their circumstances. This, in turn, softened and eased their minds and bodies and opened up more creativity and flexibility in their responses. They also showed greater cheerfulness and sometimes even a sense of humour about their situation. As Eckhart Tolle observes: “Life isn’t as serious as the mind makes it out to be.”

Courage: When inhabiting the present moment deeply, and connected to awareness, people often felt a shift to a sense of courage and confidence that they could handle whatever life might throw their way; they suddenly felt that they had all the resources inside to do so. They were better able to stay brave in the face of fear, difficult emotions and thoughts, more able now to stand up to them and work with them skillfully. They also showed a firm commitment to their values and doing what they felt deep in their heart was right, even if it wasn’t the smooth or easy option. This courage also allowed them to be more authentic in their expression of who they truly were, no longer so dominated by worry about what others would think.

These qualities are inherent to our deeper nature so we have access to them in any given moment. They don’t need to be created, built, or manufactured. They simply need to be accessed.

Fulfilment: Connected with their deepest self, people found a new kind of contentment. They reported feeling connection to a sense of wholeness, completeness, and fulfillment that wasn’t dependent on anything external, and they often experienced feelings of profound well-being, along with gratitude for things that before had been overlooked.

Connection: People often reported a feeling of connection to something larger than themselves. Sometimes this was a feeling of spiritual connection, sometimes a greater sense of connection to people, the planet, or even to life itself. With this sense of connection, they gained a much broader perspective on life, beyond their everyday circumstances. This in turn led to feelings of belonging, wholeness and even an enhanced reverence for life. Suddenly their problems felt smaller and more manageable in the context of a much broader and larger world view.

These qualities are inherent to our deeper nature so we have access to them in any given moment. They don’t need to be created, built, or manufactured. They simply need to be accessed. The ability to access and act from these strengths is what we might call wisdom or spiritual intelligence.

We focus on cultivating the skills to access and act from the strengths inherent in the deeper self again and again, until they become more and more embodied and sink into our bones and our whole being like warm sunshine. They then flow out into the world through our speech, actions, and attitudes.

Although words are tricky when it comes to our deep nature and ultimately fail to describe and define it, this deeper part of our human nature is key in our journey to true, lasting and stable inner strength.

Excerpted from Deep Resilience by Melli O’Brien, published by Rethink Press. Copyright © 2024 Melli O’Brien. Reprinted with permission.