How To Bounce Back When Your Heart Isn't In Something Anymore

When you’ve lost heart and are feeling defeated or deflated, it’s really important to acknowledge these feelings. Talking to someone who can compassionately witness you may be very therapeutic. Whether it’s a friend, a family member, or a professional counselor, it can be healing to share these emotions and have the other person normalize the experience by reminding you that they too have felt this way before, or that all people cycle through these feelings. Getting things off your chest by talking them through can immediately lighten your energy.

Whether you’ve been through a breakup and lost heart about finding a loving relationship, or an experience you had high hopes for did not turn out anything like you planned, it will take time for your heart to heal. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Healthy self-care practices—like taking any supplements or medication you require, getting enough rest, avoiding unnecessary stress and drama, doing gentle exercise, engaging in your favorite activities, and feeling connected to people you care about—will help bolster and strengthen your energy body. Your energy body is separate from and larger than your physical body, but they are connected. Supporting your mental, emotional, and physical health does wonders for your energy!

We all have activities that traditionally have brought us joy. Some of mine include sitting in my garden and listening to gentle music; watching a favorite movie or TV show with characters I really relate to; visiting one of my favorite local bookstores, cafes, or metaphysical shops; taking a walk in my favorite safe park; wearing a beautiful outfit and jewelry; taking a day trip out of my normal environment with someone I love or to visit someone I love; having a simple, cheap date with a good friend or my partner; getting lost in a great book; getting lost in a creative project; cleaning and beautifying my space; spending time with a child or younger person in my life. After one of these activities my heart feels more expansive and my energy body feels more alive. My outlook on life is often vastly improved too.

Tiny acts of humanity can rebuild your faith in humanity. Stick to your healthy boundaries, by all means. And also speak to people and treat them with compassion—soften your voice and your approach. Remind the people you love that you care. Tell someone thank you for a kindness they did for you and let yourself gush a bit. Be polite and considerate while interacting with strangers in person, on the phone, or online. Smile at a cashier, wish a service provider a great weekend, or wave to a neighbor. Being mindfully compassionate to those around you rekindles your heart energy—and can even inspire others to be more compassionate with you.

When we lose heart, it’s because something significant happened—or maybe a bunch of little things happened—that took the wind out of our sails. Take extra time for your own healing. Clear space in your schedule and tell others “no” with love if you feel overwhelmed. If you’ve lost heart, you may not have as much in reserve for giving right now. Remember you can still give in smaller doses—like doing a roommate a simple favor that only takes you a second—to feel connected and of service. Nurture yourself now to grow your own heart energy.

If a child in your life graduated a grade or found the courage to compete in something they care about, let yourself savor their win. If there’s a cause you care about in the world and a recent positive development is in the news cycle, smile and feel the satisfaction of positive change happening in the world. Your energetic heart is enormous—it has the capacity to care about so many people and so many issues. Taking a break from focusing on your life and your issues can actually be refreshing and lighten your heart’s load.

Certain stones, colors, or scents are believed to help repair and stimulate heart energy. Wear the color green, which is associated with the heart chakra, or spend time in a green and lush nature setting. Keep a piece of pink rose quartz in the shape of a heart on your desk or nightstand, or get a green malachite bracelet of beads to wear on your wrist. Work with rose, lavender, or ylang ylang essential oil in a mister, diffuser, or incense stick. Remember that when working with these tools, it’s much more powerful if your mindful intention is to support heart energy so that the tool becomes a loving reminder of that intention.

Connecting to your inner mystic means realizing that it's not all on you to orchestrate or figure everything out in your life (whew!). You can ask the Divine to step in and assist. While physical or emotional healing are matters you should always consult human health-care professionals about, energy healing is something you can safely ask for Spirit's support with—and it works. Ask Archangel Raphael, the angel of healing, in your journal to help heal your heart energy, or meditate with Archangel Chamuel, the angel of peace, to calm and soothe your energy body. Any loving spirit guide, including spirit animals, that resonates with you can work. 

The takeaway.

Use your intuition to discern which heart-energy technique you might benefit from most right now. Ask your sixth sense for a number between 1 and 9. You might hear the number as a gentle voice in your mind, or see the number as a picture in your mind. You can also scan the numbers and notice which number you are most energetically drawn to. I heard the number “four” in my mind, so right now I should piggyback off someone else’s heart energy to boost my own.