The Case for Putting Expensive Eggs on Cheap Pizza

Eggs are expensive right now. I know it. You know it. Allie knows it. But they still cost less than a lot of other things. For what it’s worth, I can still find conventional eggs at Fred Meyer, a Kroger chain, for under $3 a dozen. (There’s a limit on how many you can buy at a time, but that’s still really cheap). I’m not going to quit eating eggs, is what I’m saying; not when they’re one of the easiest ways to make a cheap convenience food feel like a meal.

I like to poach them in a cup of instant miso soup for a warm and filling breakfast, but I’m not above cracking one onto a cheap frozen pizza—and I mean really cheap; Totino’s cheap—because it tastes good. Egg yolk is the perfect sauce for super salty, processed foods. It’s rich, but in a way that feels nurturing, probably from all the B vitamins.

Eggs and pizza are a cheap meal

An expensive egg on a cheap pizza makes a filling, cost-effective meal, even with egg prices being what they are. Even if you were to shell out 10 bucks for organic eggs and crack two of them onto a Totino’s pizza, you’re still only paying a little over three American dollars for a meal. Not too shabby. And you don’t have to go with Totino’s, obviously—use any frozen pizza you choose.

You may have to play around with the timing. In my experience, it takes my 450-degree oven at least seven minutes for a set egg white and runny yolk. I know I like my pizza on the crispy side, so I let it get through at least half of its 15-minute cook time before adding the eggs. If you mess up the timing and it looks like your pizza is going to burn before the egg is set, just pop on the broiler for a minute or two. Finish with hot sauce and wash it down with a Diet Coke for the perfect dirtbag brunch.